You ruined my life
by seddierox13
Summary: Just another beautiful sad Sam/Freddie Seddie one-shot. Freddie admits his love for Sam who is in a happy relationship. At least she thinks it's happy. She doesn't want to speak to Freddie anymore. But then the guy dumps her. What will Freddie do? Review!


Freddie's POV

I couldn't believe I actually felt like this. Why now? I mean, she already has a boyfriend. Mike's not a bad guy and she seems happy with him. I don't know if I should tell her. Cause if I do, it might not turn out as I planned and it may ruin her whole life. And mine. My mom told me I should tell her. She is the only person to know I fell in love with Sam Puckett. Sam has the right to know so I'm just gonna do it. Today. No ifs, ands or buts.

---

I heard her footsteps coming from the hall. She was going over to Carly's. It's now or never, I said to myself. I got out of my apartment and saw her. Her golden hair falling round her beautiful face. And her eyes. I could never forget those eyes. Deep blue eyes. She stopped and looked at me.

"Can I talk to you?" I asked her.

"Shoot." her perfectly safe voice made my heart feel warm. I looked to the floor and sighed, scared of looking back up to her.

"What's going on?" she didn't sound sympathetic. She sounded bored out. I started to speak.

"What I'm about to tell you may not be very good. In a lot of ways, but I'm just gonna say it. Here it goes."

I thought I was prepared. I hoped I was prepared. I took a deep breath.

"I'm in love with you, Sam." Those were the words I didn't know if I was gonna regret.

"You're kidding, right?" her eyes were full of hope and a little smile appeared on her face. I didn't want to make it go away, but I already decided I had to. I separated my eyes from the floor and and looked straight into hers.

"No."

Her smile faded as her face became motionless. She was looking for an explanation with her eyes taped to my front door. She stood there for a few more seconds. The last few seconds I was gonna see her without any emotions that involved me ruining her life. She got out of her trance.

"I have to get out of here." she started walking away.

"Wait." I called her back. She turned around. The last turn without yelling at me for ruining her life.

"Please. Don't do this. I don't want you to stop hanging out with me just cause I told you that. I promise I won't bother you but... I... I can't loose you, Sam."

I could see the anger boiling up in her eyes. She said something I didn't expect her to say. And it didn't feel nice.

"You can' t loose what you never had." she started making her way out again.

"Sam, wait." I grabbed her arm to make her stop leaving. She roughly shook my hand off.

"Get your hands off of me." she said and ran of.

It was official. I hurt Sam Puckett. And it didn't feel nice as I thought it would two years ago. It felt awful.

There's a Possibility,  
There's a Possibility,  
All I'm gonna get is gone with your step  
All I'm gonna get is gone with your step

So tell me when you hear my heart stop  
You're the only one that knows  
Tell me when you hear my silence  
There's a possibility I wouldn't know

Know that when you leave,  
Know that when you leave,  
By blood and by me, you walk like a thief,  
By blood and by me, and I fall when you leave

So tell me when you hear my heart stop,  
You're the only one that knows.  
Tell me when you hear my silence,  
There's a possibility I wouldn't know.  
So tell me when my silence's over,  
You're the reason why I'm closed.  
Tell me when you hear me falling,  
There's a possibility it wouldn't show.

By blood and by me, and I'll fall when you leave.  
By blood and by me, I follow your lead.

---

Weeks passed and she didn't even look at me. She didn't seem as happy as she was before, even though she was with Mike. I didn't have any contacts with Carly, Spencer or my mom. I just sat alone on my fire escape thinking how I ruined her life. Why have I done that?

The same song played over and over. But I couldn't hear it. The coldness was unbearable. But I couldn't feel it. The moon was shining and trying to tell me something. But I couldn't see it. The delicious dinner mom made was on the table. But I couldn't smell it. The juice streamed down my throat. But I couldn't recognize its taste. The blond girl didn't want me to talk to her. But I couldn't get her out of my head.

The last words I heard her say were 'Get your hands off of me!' and it made my heart freeze. What have I done?

I felt my phone vibrate in my front pocket. I looked at the text. It was from Carly.

_Freddie, I heard about you and Sam and I'm really sorry. But I think she needs you now.  
Mike dumped her. She's sitting on my couch, crying, and I'm upstairs in the iCarly studio.  
Please come. Maybe you can work this out. Good luck_

_Carly xx_

I sighed and got out of my chair. I finally noticed what song was playing. It was _Nothing else matters_ by _Metallica._ Oh, well. On my way out mom asked where I was going. But I didn't answer. I got out of the apartment and slowly opened Carly's front door.

There she was, crying the hell out of her being. She looked up at the sound of the closing door. She obviously didn't want me to be there.

"What do _you _want? I bet you're happy now!" she yelled. I sighed.

"Sam... I could not be happy if you are not happy." I didn't care what I was saying or doing, cause this couldn't be any worse. She was hurt. I was hurt. I sat on the couch beside her, but not too close. I didn't want to get her upset.

"You ruined my life." she said staring at Carly's blank TV, showing no emotions. What have I done to her? She was broken.

"I'm sorry." that's all I could've said. She didn't move or do anything.

"What did Mike do to you?" I asked her, hoping she would answer.

"Apparently, he just dated me to get some other chick jealous." as she said that another tear slid down her red cheek. That's when I noticed she was wearing a beautiful black dress. It was knee length and tightened around her waist. She also had a sparkly necklace.

"Why are you all dressed up?" I asked, trying to sound less interested than I was.

"Cause when he asked me on a date he told me I have to get dressed real pretty because he has something special to tell me. And that special thing was the truth. He brought all of his friends to the restaurant so he could embarrass me." I listened to her shaky voice and saw how hard it was for her to actually pronounce those words. She held her tears for a few more seconds but then she burst out crying.

I felt really sorry for her cause she didn't deserve it. I moved closer to her and hugged her. She didn't do anything to stop me, but I didn't want to go further with hugging or anything. She calmed down.

"Why, Freddie? Why does nobody love me?" she said.

"I do."I calmly answered. She looked into my eyes. Her look made me shiver.

"Why?" she asked me.

"Because... You're smart, funny and... Well, beautiful." I said looking at the floor.

"You really mean that?" her voice filled the room. I just nodded, too ashamed to look at her.

"Freddie?" I lifted my head up to her "Yeah?"

"I really appreciate it. What you just said. And I'm sorry for the way I reacted when you first told me." she smiled at me. I couldn't believe it! She actually smiled! At me! I smiled back and said:

"It's okay." suddenly, her smile disappeared and she got lost in my eyes. She just stared at them for another minute and I was too scared to move or say anything. As if she would have gone.

Then, she started moving her face closer to mine. I could barely feel her heavy breath on my left cheek. When we were just a few inches away she stopped moving. I didn't want to do anything to hurry her so I just lightly sighed. She was still looking into my eyes. The closeness was driving me crazy. But I didn't move.

She slowly closed her eyes and sighed much heavier than I did. She then started leaning in again. I did nothing. After a few moments I felt her upper lip brush against my lower lip. It sent shivers through my whole body. She finally kissed me, fully on the lips. At that moment I didn't know where I was or what time it was. The only thing I knew is that I was kissing Sam Puckett.

**Review, guys! You know you want to! xx**


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